Thursday, August 30, 2012

Clint Eastwood talks to inanimate objects at RNC; doctor apologizes

photo courtesy of Getty

Clint Eastwood addresses a chair he believes to be President Obama .

LIZZIE BIBBS
Hollywood Vindicator

Clint Eastwood’s doctor apologized after subscribing him the wrong medication which caused him to hallucinate President Barack Obama during his speech at the Republican National Convention.
In fact Eastwood was talking to an empty chair.
“I was so surprise Obama agreed to come on stage with me,” Eastwood said after making his speech.
Eastwood stood in front of millions across the nation and held a full conversation with the chair he thought was seated with Obama.
Some at the convention  saw the act as a joke.
“I just thought what a character,” Josie Monaray, from Augusta, Georgia, said. “I was laughing during most of his speech.”
Others saw the true madness of Eastwood’s nature.
“I whispered to my wife, I think he’s having a psychotic episode,” John Frohn, a doctor himself from Houston, Texas, said. “She whispered back to me, ‘No honey. He’s old. It’s Alzheimer’s’.”
Robert Yessy, Eastwood’s doctor was embarrassed as he realized his mistake.
“I wrote the wrong prescription. I will take the blame for what occurred at the RNC. I am ashamed,” Yessy said.
According to Yessy, he was trying experimental medications on Eastwood, many which have work but this past time around; his pen got the better of him as his handwriting was misread by a pharmacist.
“I cannot tell you the exact medication which was subscribed but I have later found the pharmacist mistook my T for a K and my E for A that made all the difference,”Yessy said.  “I’ve been trying to get his psychosis under control for years and as he got on that stage, he had crazy beaming from his eyes. I just thought, oh no.”
Before going on stage there were reports of Eastwood yelling at people backstage.
“He grabbed my shirt and pulled me close to his face and asked me if I was a democratic spy,” Brandon VanHuet said. “He called me a punk, threw me to the ground and kicked me. I feared for my life.”
Eastwood thought a group of men at the sound booth were a part of Obama’s secret service.
“He asked me how it felt to be protecting a man who is destroying our country,” Tim Gundy said. “I told him I didn’t know what he was talking about and he said, ‘Oh you’re a liberal? Well Mr. Secret Service Boy it’s nice to know some democrats have balls.’ I was highly confused and he just stared me down and then walked away.”
Gus Furgan, a backstage crewmember reported seeing Eastwood speaking to tables, chairs and even at one point the curtain.
“There was a point he took the curtain and said wow you look mighty good in red Mrs. Romney,” Furgan said. “After that he was talking with Hilary Clinton for at least 15 minutes.”
According to Furgan, Clinton was actually a broom.
“I’ve never seen anyone manhandle a broom like that,” Furgan said. “He took her to a back closet and I didn’t see him for the rest of the night.”
David Gregory was the one who found Eastwood a few hours later.
“I opened the closet door and found Mr. Eastwood only in his boxers,” Gregory said. “Wow now that was a surprise.”
Eastwood apparently with squinting eyes and a cigarette in his mouth began quoting old movie lines, some of which were from characters he portrayed and others were not.
“He said, ‘Go ahead make my day’,” Gregory said. “Then he looked at a broom which was on the ground, picked up his clothes and said. ‘Here’s looking at you kid’.”
Yessy who had been looking for Eastwood for over five hours, was notified as Eastwood sat backstage talking with an empty beer bottle or Condoleezza Rice as he would call it.
“Luckily he was pleased with that empty bottle of Coors,” Gregory said. “He really took a liking to that bottle. I would say, that must be his beer of choice.”

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